A New Beginning

“If you are brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello.”

After a two-year hiatus from blogging, I am finally back. It seems that within the past week I have had to saw a countless number of goodbyes to things that were no longer serving me–in order to begin with an entirely fresh start where I began, in Los Angeles. Things were finally–decisively–done with the boy who had been my romantic preoccupation for years, I left my job as a stylist at BCBG MAX AZRIA , and I packed up all of the items I had collected through my three years in San Diego after graduating from University.

bcbg

The lessons I learned were many (which I will delve in to later)– the power of vulnerability, the importance of self-reliance, and the realization that the circumstances around me may change but I always need to stay true to my vision at the end of the day.

XX Kathryn

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pont des arts

If I’m honest I have to tell you I still read fairy-tales and I like them best of all.

-Audrey Hepburn

♠  ♠  ♠

A part of me would still like to believe in magic. I can blame it on reading too many fairy-tales as a child, or the fact that my father raised my solely on Disney Princess movies, but it is impossible to evade the fact. And that is why the moment I heard about the tradition of attaching ‘love padlocks’ to the Pont des Arts to achieve everlasting love, I knew I had to do it.

Unfortunately, things to do not always work out as planned. One thing lead to another, and before I knew it my last night in Paris had arrived and we still had not reached the elusive ‘padlock bridge.’

Because my French was limited, and at that point in time I had no idea that the ‘love padlock’ bridge was actually called Pont des Arts– it ended in a wild goose chase with my brother and I checking each and every bridge on La Seine for the locks that were attached with so much expectation. It wasn’t until well after midnight that we finally found it, but it was well worth it. We each attached a padlock to the bridge– I wrote the name of my boyfriend and my brother wrote the name of the girl who would become his girlfriend (months later!) and we have been happily in love ever since…

I have had a fascination with keys since I was a little girl, for which I believe my love for ‘The Secret Garden’ is largely to blame. Last year, my boyfriend gave me a beautiful key necklace for our anniversary last year that I wear every day without fail. In Paris, I decided to attach the key responsible for locking my enchanted padlock to it. Et voilà, I have no chance of misplacing it…

Do any of you believe in similar superstitions? Do tell! I know they also have similar bridges in Rome and Greece, and I just find the whole practice so incredibly romantic…

 

having a coke with you

Having a Coke With You by Frank O’Hara is one of the most beautiful poems I have ever read. It is addressed to a male Ballerina dancer, and is even more enchanting when listened to:

Having a Coke with You

Is even more fun than going to San Sebastian, Irún, Hendaye, Biarritz, Bayonne
or being sick to my stomach on the Travesera de Gracia in Barcelona
     partly because in your orange shirt you look like a better happier St. Sebastian
     partly because of my love for you, partly because of your love for yoghurt
     partly because of the fluorescent orange tulips around the birches
     partly because of the secrecy our smiles take on before people and statuary
 
it is hard to believe when I’m with you that there can be anything as still
as solemn as unpleasantly definitive as statuary when right in front of it
 
in the warm New York 4 o’clock light we are drifting back and forth
between each other like a tree breathing through its spectacles
and the portrait show seems to have no faces in it at all, just paint
you suddenly wonder why in the world anyone ever did them
 
I look
at you and I would rather look at you than all the portraits in the world
except possibly for the Polish Rider occasionally and anyway it’s in the Frick
which thank heavens you haven’t gone to yet so we can go together the first time
 
and the fact that you move so beautifully more or less takes care of Futurism
just as at home I never think of the Nude Descending a Staircase or
at a rehearsal a single drawing of Leonardo or Michelangelo that used to wow me
 
and what good does all the research of the Impressionists do them
when they never got the right person to stand near the tree when the sun sank
or for that matter Marino Marini when he didn’t pick the rider as carefully
as the horse
 
it seems they were all cheated of some marvelous experience
which is not going to go wasted on me which is why I am telling you about it
 

 – Frank O’Hara, 1966

xx Kathryn